A Common Understanding
July 1, 2005
I’m not a complicated dude.
When dealing with my fellow man, I consider myself to be an optimistic realist. I know things will probably turn out badly, but I hope for the best.
It really boils down to a simple philosophy: don’t treat me like an idiot, and I won’t treat you like an idiot.
Take, for example, my friend Bill at Verizon technical support. After upgrading to Tiger, my Verizon CD no longer worked, so I had to set up my router manually. I wanted him to tell me, quickly, without making me pretend to walk around the house, jiggling my telephone cords. So I laid it on the line: here’s my problem, Bill, and here’s what I want. His response was pristine: here’s your solution Matt, did it work? Yes Bill, it did. Thanks for your help. End of transaction.
Bill shared my philosophy and provided an example of just how well things go when we all abide by it.
Unfortunately, my little plan is worthless in the face of an actual idiot.
This week I attempted to obtain my new Maryland driver’s license from the Motor Vehicle Administration. I arrived at the MVA promptly at 9 am, greeted with a line that was already 20-persons deep. I had my game face on, ready to not treat my friendly MVA representative like an idiot, in the hopes that he or she might not treat me like one. I was being too optimistic.
We went ‘round and ‘round in circles. She explained why my three pieces of postmarked, printed and stamped mail addressed to me were not sufficient proof of my status as a true blue Marylander, and I explained that their list of requirements says it’s exactly sufficient. She explained that the list on the web site was outdated and I explained that that was the dumbest thing I’d ever heard. She explained that the policy was just changed “yesterday,” and I explained that “yesterday” was a Sunday. She explained that I could speak to the woman three windows over if I’d like to appeal her decision, and I explained that she could bite me.
Just a little common respect. Both for your fellow man, and for that matter, yourself. It must be depressing to work in a job where you’re practically required to irritate people for no good reason. Maybe the folks at the MVA are sadists. Or maybe they’re just idiots. Whatever. I just wish more people would subscribe to my philosophy.
The folks at the MVA are sadists. Customer service is something they laugh at. If at all possible, take your business to the MVA Express in Kenilworth. Most of my experiences at that branch have left me just plain old pissed off, instead of pissed off and wanting to bite people. They also take sexy pictures- yes you read it right- SEXY driver’s license pics.
I have to get mine renewed in a couple weeks & I’m dreading it. You’ve made me feel much better!
the Dear Wife and I went through the very same affair a couple weeks ago. Oh, my god. Maryland has THE WORST DMV I’ve ever seen, and I’ve lived quite a few places.